Smartman+smartwoman=romance

Smartman+dumbwoman=affair

Dumbman+smartwoman=marriage

Dumbman+dumbwoman=pregnancy

OFFICEARITHMETIC

Smartboss+smartemployee=profit

Smartboss+dumbemployee=production

Dumbboss+smartemployee=promotion

Dumbboss+dumbemployee=overtime

SHOPPINGMATH

Amanwillpay$2fora$1itemheneeds.

Awomanwillpay$1fora$2itemthatshedoesn\'tneed.

GENERALEQUATIONS&STATISTICS

Awomanworriesaboutthefutureuntilshegetsahusband.

Amanneverworriesaboutthefutureuntilhegetsawife.

Asuccessfulmanisonewhomakesmoremoneythanhiswifecanspend.

Asuccessfulwomanisonewhocanfindsuchaman.

HAPPINESS

Tobehappywithaman,youmustunderstandhimalotandlovehimalittle.

Tobehappywithawoman,youmustloveheralotandnottrytounderstandheratall.

LONGEVITY

Marriedmenlivelongerthansinglemendo,butmarriedmenarealotmorewillingtodie.

PROPENSITYTOCHANGE

Awomanmarriesamanexpectinghewillchange,buthedoesn\'t.

Amanmarriesawomanexpectingthatshewon\'tchange,andshedoes.

DISCUSSIONTECHNIQUE

Awomanhasthelastwordinanyargument.

Anythingamansaysafterthatisthebeginningofanewargument.

HOWTOSTOPPEOPLEFROMBUGGINGYOUABOUTGETTINGMARRIED

Oldauntsusedtocomeuptomeatweddings,pokingmeintheribsandcackling,tellingme,"You\'renext."TheystoppedafterIstarteddoingthesamethingtothematfunerals.

SENDTHISTOASMARTWOMANWHONEEDSALAUGHANDTOTHESMARTGUYSYOUKNOWCANHANDLEIT.